Thursday, March 28, 2013

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

Directed by Stephen Sommers

Story by Michael Gordon and Stuart Beattie & Stephen Sommers

Screenplay by Stuart Beattie and David Elliott & Paul Lovett

Stars: Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, Sienna Miller, Dennis Quaid, Ray Park, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Christopher Eccleston, Byung-hun Lee, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Rachel Nichols, Saïd Taghmaoui, Arnold Vosloo and Jonathan Pryce

I have decided recently that I want to see the dumb action movies, because I hate being disappointed with "good films". My bottom ten list for last year was more disappoints than actual shit films. Movies the young, dumb and full of fun. One of those movies was G.I. Joe: Retaliation. Not seeing the first film, I wanted to have a "clear" understanding of what the hell would happen when it opens.

Every American boy grew up with having the cartoons on. The live action version deals with an arms dealer, McCullen (Eccleston) that wants to weaponize nanomite technology in order to take over the world. Duke Hauser (Tatum) is on a military assignment with Ripcord (Wayans) to escort the nanomites when it was interrupted by Cobra. Duke and Ripcord fall into the G.I. Joes, a convert government organization that wants to stop McCullen.

I wanted to turn off my brain to watch this movie, but I couldn't. The G.I. Joe initiative is supposed to be the best of the best the military have to offer. The Cobra could easily fool the Joes is the stupidest ways possible. Do we the need to see the flashbacks? Seriously? The love backstory between The Baroness (Miller) and Duke was nauseating to say the least.

I can enjoy a big, dumb action film, but it seems the story is lazy. You cannot tell if people were in on the joke that it is a movie that it based on Hasbro toy line and cartoon. The only one that didn't take it seriously was JoGo as The Doctor.

My Rating

1 comment:

  1. Yeah, this film was DoA alright. I remember when it came out I hadn't heard a word about JGL in years. Knowing what a fine actor he is he was definitely slumming in this film. Nice rating system Branden.
    Lamb #1444